2021-07-14 Plumber Porn

PLUMBER PORN

If there was one thing I accomplished today that must be above the rest, it has to be hooking up the ice maker on the ol’ new Samsung fridge.

We have been here nearly two months and although there is a water line all set up in the wall behind the refrigerator, we had moved our “ice box” around so much that it didn’t make any sense to connect the line till now.

Ironically, after picking up the kids from farm camp today, we ran to Target to purchase some ice trays. Ultimately, if the freezer has made some ice chips (I’m imagining that’s what they call them in Canada or England) the trays are almost-immediately moot.

However, before Tar-jay we stopped by Home Dee-poh to purchase a part to connect the fridge water line to the faucet.

When my father-in-law checked it out the other day and offered some guidance he said matter-of-factly, “You need a female to female connection here.”

I immediately jumped on the opportunity to make a joke, “Sounds like plumber porn to me,” which was a reference to the classic Steve Martin stand up comedy routine about “the plumber convention in town,” which I had shared with Roland recently.

However, my joke fell flat because both my father-in-law and his sidekick Leo are hard of hearing. “Huh?” was not the response I wanted, especially since my wife was standing there and she simply rolled her eyes in response.

Anyway, I picked up the trays and the plumber’s sex toy and ultimately fixed the ice maker. Admittedly, it took some manual and troubleshooting video watching on how to reset the line, but by 11 PM we were all hooked up.

The reason I emphasize how important this task was is that I haven’t made myself a proper cocktail at home since we landed and that was starting to drive me to drink. Except I was getting tired of having everything warm and “neat.” Especially since we had recently ventured to Total Wine & Spirits, which is an alcoholic’s paradise.

Anyway, with gin, Mezcal and bourbon, along with bitters, Campari and maraschino cherries all ready to “shake & bake,” I was eager to make some rocks for my lowball.

As I mentioned, seemingly we’ll be ready to get back to proper drinking tomorrow.

Meanwhile, a few other things we accomplished today include hanging up a heavy mirror in my room, as well as a few family portraits in the vestibule; finally putting out a few solar lights on the trail, the housing for which I ingeniously made from leftover 4” gutter connections and duct tape; and the purchase of two arm chairs at The Cat secondhand store, which I had seen over July 4th weekend that were 25% off.

Alas, that sale was over, but luckily the happy-go-lucky shopkeeper, Justin, informed me that on Tuesdays senior citizens get 30% off everything. Hence, I quickly texted my father-in-law, enticing him to come to the store because I also saw a mountain bike for Leo.

Ultimately, we made out magnificently - everyone got what they wanted and more, all at a steep discount.

Moreover, I had the chance to take Roland, Leo and the kids to Sosa’s for dinner, which I had bragged had the best tamales in town. And Leo and I agreed that they served some pretty authentic Mexican rice and frijoles too.

Ultimately, it was another awesome and productive day at Hacienda Dominguez & Chelenzo Farms. We got stuff done, stuff we wanted and got to eat more great food. Hard to ask for more than that.